I tend to be pretty chill and it takes a bit for me to get cranked up about something. Lately though, I’ve noticed that my fuse is a bit shorter and I’m more easily offended by this or that. Getting on my mat and breathing, moving and meditating definitely helps keep me from dumping that irritability on others, but I want to make sure I don’t totally douse that growing burn. I need it. We all need it.
It’s the rising energy of spring. It’s time for change and we need some revving up from the quieter pace of winter to get us going again. It’s the push against the hard shell of the seed to be able pop out and move towards the growing nourishing light and watering of spring. We may feel like we’re getting sick of the cold weather and ice. We may feel cooped up and dreaming about hiking, swimming, or other warm climate adventures. We feel more rebellious. We may feel a little less comfortable in our own skin.
That’s sort of a romantic way of framing it, isn’t it? And it may be helpful; it is for me. It helps to know there’s a greater intelligence at play within that crabbiness. A bigger picture, or a long game, if you will that eases the harshness of the moment. It lets us off the perfectionist’s hook. But like I said, it’s also important to honor and value that building friction just as it is.
In fact, that rising energy can feel crummy. You may feel grumpy and just kinda bad inside. You may not be able to avoid snapping at loved ones or even strangers if they get in your way. You may have more negative thoughts about yourself. You may feel like life is unfair and relentlessly busy or dramatic these days. You may feel more hopeless.
All those feels are OK! You might want to apologize for your rudeness if you need to but you don’t have to beat yourself up about it. Welcome to the grit of being real.
Is any of this resonating?
When I stop and pause and bring consciousness to this rising energy and notice what it feels like physically, I feel a hot churn in my stomach and a physical impulse to gnash my teeth and snarl. So, I do! Not at anyone if I can help it, but privately and out loud. Feels good. Highly recommend!
Just like the wild things in Where The Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak.
“And when he came to the place where the wild things are, they roared their terrible roars and they gnashed their terrible teeth and they rolled their terrible eyes and showed their terrible claws…”
Change is hard—and it’s inevitable. It’s part of the cycles of life. We all have different tolerance ranges for change but for real transformation to happen we’re all going to feel some discomfort through the process. And it’s ok to grump about it. The key is to eventually realize that most of the discomfort you feel is the friction of resisting change or trying to control what you can’t.
Hang in there! You got this! Remember to laugh at yourself every once in awhile. If you want some support around cultivating a deeper sense of balance and anchoring for the rough spots, check out my offerings this month and next!
